i just cut bedtime really short so i could run down here and write these down.

i don’t know if i spoke at all during eliza’s overtired rambling.  i almost missed it too.  i had already said goodnight when she asked if i could cuddle her.  i gave 2 minutes.  here was her monologue:

at bedtime i like to play a game with god that i can only play with god:  i count to one and before i get to one god already {know that eliza says “all-weddy” and all other r sounds like that to follow…it adds to the effect} got to 100 counting really slow.  no one else can do that.  or if they can it’s only because they have that power from god. but i don’t think they do. i might do a bad thing.  and that would be god’s fault.  {pause} wait, would it?  no, wait.  that’s our choice.  not god’s. can you get in trouble from god?  well, why would you when god knew you were going to do it? i think the bible might be all wrong.  i mean, god would know if it was.  and it might be.  but  {insert lip smack and raised eyebrows} god knows so that’s all that matters.

her final words bring me comfort…for her and for me and for all the world:

god knows and that’s all that matters.